Caregivers can apply the principals found in Steven Covey’s book, “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”, to caring for aging relatives and empower your role of a family caregiver. Utilize these seven habits as a compass for caregiving stress.

1.    Take a Proactive Approach.  Caring for an elderly parent can be stressful if you fail to plan. By planning ahead and taking initiative, you can avoid the stress that comes with work/life responsibilities. Begin early with conversations with your mom and dad about how they want to live out their lives; home care or community care?

2.    Begin with the End in Mind. Evaluate what’s important to your life, and if family is most important then devote the resources of time, energy and talent to that end. Help your aging parent plan for their future. Many seniors and elders alike, assume they will be able to care for themselves in the future even when they become frail.

3.    Put First Things First. Work with your family on a daily and weekly basis in planning goals, appointments, and obligations. Organize all information as a means to focus and plan the goals. It would be great to have a planning session like this with mom and dad before they become elderly. This will help them ease their fear of being forced out of their home in their later years.

4.    Think Win/Win.  Instead of looking to caring for your kids and elderly parents as a source of stress, approach it with a positive mindset. Your positive attitude will rub off on family members, and in turn, they will feel loved and important. Establish everyone’s roles from the outset so as to make everyone feel a part of the caregiving situation.

5.    Seek First to Understand and then be understood.  Covey teaches the idea of mutual understanding between people, and this can certainly apply with Grandma and children. Be empathetic when they express their differences and concerns. If your child or parent is being ornery towards you, listen to what they are saying, and try and get to the root of the problem.

6.    Synergize.  Come up with creative ways to get all family members involved. Perhaps your teenager can play a board game with Grandma while Mom can make dinner. Or Grandpa can teach a youngster a history lesson that applies towards homework. Make use of everyone’s differences to benefit the family as a whole.

7.    Sharpen the Saw. There’s much to be said for balance, and thus a family caregiver must take strides to take care of his or herself. Be sure to renew yourself in all facets of your life, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, and keep on giving.

When applying Covey’s teachings, the family caregiver will find the experience rewarding, creating a feedback loop that makes all family members feel good. Aging parents will feel appreciated and valued when they see that they too, are a part of the care-giving experience.